So, this is what I'm thinking…

So I’m in the foyer of the building I work in, and I’ve pressed the button for the elevator. I’m just daydreaming about what I’ll find waiting for me in my inbox. I’m alone. I’ve got my iPod on, half listening to some podcast to occupy my mind in the tedious minutes before clocking on. I’m waiting to one side of the elevator doorway so that when the door opens any occupants can get out without any inconvenience. I’m cool like that. Always thinking of others.

That’s the plan, anyhow. Over the dulcet tones of the podcaster yammering in my ears I hear the bell announcing that the elevator has arrived on my floor. It has been only a few seconds, perhaps less than 15, since I pressed the button. Honestly I couldn’t tell if it was 15 seconds or 15 minutes. At that time of day it’s all the same to me.

From my vantage point on the left side of the open doorway, I can see that there’s nobody on the right side of the elevator waiting to get out. I wait a couple heartbeats. This time period straddles the line of giving enough time for any unseen occupants on the left side of the elevator to get through the doorway and not being long enough for the doors to start to automatically close.

After these few heartbeats, I start walking through the door almost, but not quite, like the workers in Fritz Lang’s Metropolis. There’s a woman standing inside the elevator right behind the left bulkhead, I guess you call it, looking at me like I was something she had stepped in. “Aren’t you going to wait until I get out?” she says gruffly, the smells of cigarettes and nail polish wafting through the air. I hadn’t seen her from the same position outside the doors. “Oh, sorry” I say, and take a step back. She spends another second bending down to pick up her handbag laying on the floor of the elevator and stomps past me out into the foyer, her snooty nose pointed skywards and her lips puckered and looking like a cat’s bum.

I didn’t know what to think, really. I’d waited what I thought was a good amount of time to allow anyone in the elevator to get out. Perhaps it wasn’t long enough. But I know those elevators and how long the doors generally stay open before automatically closing and I was cutting it pretty fine. Why had the woman waited so long to start moving? Indeed she needed to retrieve her bag from the floor which took another second or so and if it weren’t for me standing in the doorway then the doors would have already started closing.

You may think differently, but I thought I was treated unfairly by this woman. Usually when I get off the elevator I’m already in position right in front of the door which serves two purposes:

1. it allows anyone getting in the elevator to see there’s someone (me) waiting to get out; and
2. it saves time for others so that they don’t need to wait for me to get my act together getting out the door, holding them up on their way to wherever they’re going.

I don’t know. Maybe she was daydreaming herself and got caught out and decided to take it out on me. Maybe she’s a passive aggressive drama queen, needing some kind of attention from anyone even if it’s negative. She might have expected a fight or at least a glare back, and I let her down by not giving it to her.

But the question remains: What is the acceptable length of time to wait for someone to get out of the elevator? Does it matter that you can or can’t see them?

Damned if this movie isn’t starting to look sexy as hell.

Here’s a list of dialog we hear more than once in the Star Wars Saga. Star Wars has many great quotations from any one of the six movies, but we sometimes find threads of dialog woven through more than one movie. They help to tie the films together, and invoke memories of other characters and situations found in other scenes. Some other the lines are almost a trademark of one character, and even though some lines are found in all six movies they aren’t over used to the point of being cheesy.

The Star Wars Saga

“May the Force be with you”

• General Dodonna, during the briefing in A New Hope
• Han Solo, in the Yavin hangar in A New Hope
• Luke Skywalker, to Lando and Chewbacca departing from the medical frigate at the end of The Empire Strikes Back
• Admiral Ackbar says “May the Force be with us, on the bridge of the rebel starcruiser in Return of the Jedi
• Qui-Gon Jinn, to Anakin Skywalker before the start of the Pod Race in The Phantom Menace
• Mace Windu and Yoda, in the Jedi Council Chambers after discussing the possible discovery of a Sith Lord in The Phantom Menace
• Yoda to Qui-Gon, after instructing him to go to Naboo to find the identity of the “dark warrior” encountered on Tatooine in The Phantom Menace
• Obi-Wan Kenobi and Anakin Skywalker to each other, after Anakin is given the assignment to accompany Padme to Naboo in Attack of the Clones
• Yoda to Obi-Wan, after discovering that files have been erased from the archives in Attack of the Clones
• Mace Windu says “May the Force be with us all” to the Jedi Council after roles are assigned for the coming battles in Revenge of the Sith
• Yoda to Mace and Obi-Wan aboard the Jedi Gunship in Revenge of the Sith
• Anakin Skywalker and Obi-Wan to each other, before parting to their assignments on the landing platform in Revenge of the Sith
• Yoda and Obi-wan to each other before parting ways to confront Darth Sidious and Darth Vader in Revenge of the Sith

“I’ve got a bad feeling about this”

• Luke Skywalker upon Obi-Wan Kenobi revealing that they weren’t heading to a small moon but to a space station in A New Hope
• Han Solo, in the trash compactor when Luke Skywalker is released by the Dianoga in A New Hope
• Princess Leia, inside the cave on the asteroid in The Empire Strikes Back
• C-3PO to R2-D2, before being ushered into Jabba’s Palace by Bib Fortuna in Return of the Jedi
• Han Solo, while being placed on top of the Ewok barbecue in Return of the Jedi
• Obi-Wan Kenobi, while waiting to be met by the Trade Federation delegates in The Phantom Menace
• Obi-Wan, while being shat at by Zam Wesell in Attack of the Clones
• Anakin Skywalker, when confronted with three monsters in the execution arena in Attack of the Clones
• Obi-Wan, during the battle above Coruscant in Revenge of the Sith

“A disturbance in the Force”

• Obi-Wan Kenobi, sensing that Alderaan has been destroyed in A New Hope
• The Emperor, while communicating with Darth Vader aboard the Executor in The Empire Strikes Back
• Qi-Gon Jinn, sensing all is not well before boarding the Trade Federation battleship in The Phantom Menace
• Yoda to Mace Windu, while discussing the attack on the Naboo Senator in Attack of the Clones

“We’re Doomed!”

• C-3PO, aboard the Tantive IV in A New Hope
• C-3PO, while escaping the giant space slug aboard the Millennium Falcon in The Empire Strikes Back
• C-3PO, on learning that he and Artoo are to be given as gifts to Jabba the Hutt in Return of the Jedi

“It’s not my fault!”

• Han Solo, twice to Princess Leia after finding that the Millennium Falcon will not make the jump to lightspeed to escape the Imperial Star Destroyers in The Empire Strike Back
• Lando Calrissian, to Princess Leia after finding that the Millennium Falcon will not make the jump to lightspeed to escape the Imperial Star Destroyers in The Empire Strike Back
• Han Solo, explaining to Jabba the Hutt that he got a little side tracked while on the way to pay him back in Return of the Jedi

“I’m going to regret this”

• C-3PO when boarding the escape pod in A New Hope
• Leia, “You’re going to regret this” to Jabba the Hutt before he kisses her in Return of the Jedi

“I love you.” “I know.”

• Han Solo to Princess Leia before being frozen in carbonite in The Empire Strikes Back
• Leia to Solo while being cornered by Imperial troops at the Endor bunker in Return of the Jedi

“Not entirely stable”

• C-3PO, “Sir, it’s quite possible this asteroid is not entirely stable” to Han Solo while in the asteroid cave in The Empire Strikes Back
• C-3PO, “I’m not sure this floor is entirely stable” while being introduced by Anakin to Padme in The Phantom Menace

“Where the fun begins”

• Han Solo, “Here’s where the fun begins!” after taking off from Tatooine in A New Hope
• Anakin Skywalker, “This is where the fun begins.” during the battle above Coruscant in Revenge of the Sith

“You assume too much”

• Nute Gunray to Padme Amidala in The Phantom Menace
• Padme to Qui-Gon in The Phantom Menace

I don’t consider myself to be an expert in anything, really. Not even Darth Vader action figures which is my main hobby, and certainly not in art, literature, sport, theology or any scholarly pursuits.

I do, however, consider myself to be well rounded, in that I know a little bit about a lot of things. I think it’s important to be cultured and informed on issues, and to be able to at least identify and have some background knowledge on as many subjects as I can. For example, I am not expert in art but I can identify culturally significant works such as the Mona Lisa, The Birth of Venus, Persistence of Memory, The Great Wave or Starry Night.

It’s for this reason I share with you some of the most beautiful, awe inspiring astronomy and space exploration images ever taken. People should know, or have a good idea, on the subject and story behind each image and have a sense of the history of space exploration and the wonders on offer in the heavens above.

Click each thumbnail for links to larger images and explanations on each one. These are some of my favourites, significant to me because of the degree of difficulty in taking the images or because of the awesome wonder of what is being shown. Compare the first two images, “Pale Blue Dot” and “Hubble Ultra Deep Field”. The first shows us our own world, the limit and extends thereof seen clearly from a distance, and it seems really small. The second shows one tiny, dark part of our sky and reveals that it isn’t just filled with stars but galaxies.

The universe is indeed a wondrous place.

My stats:
938 unread work emails.
1002 unread personal emails.

The madness has to stop. What was once a 30 minute annoyance is now my full-time job.  Here are 5 time saving tips:

5: Add a http://three.sentenc.es/ email signature and keep them short.

“Treat all email responses like SMS text messages, using a set number of letters per response. Since it’s too hard to count letters, we count sentences instead.

three.sentenc.es is a personal policy that all email responses regardless of recipient or subject will be three sentences or less. It’s that simple.”

Example signature:
——————————————–
Q: Why is this email three sentences or less?
A: http://three.sentenc.es
——————————————–

4: Type “Sent from iPhone” under your short responses.  People don’t expect long responses when you’re on your phone. Don’t forget to mispell a few words.

This all looks graet +1!!
Sent from iPhone.

3: Create a ‘VIP’ filter. Easy to do on GMail.  Add your boss, investors, and close friends. Flag them red and throw them in a separate folder. This is the first place I check every morning.

2: (Gmail only) Keep the spam out.  If you’re giving your address to a potentially shady website, tack on +spam to the end, example: yourname+spam@gmail.com. You can then filter those emails into a spam folder you check periodically. (ProTip: the +spam is a variable that can be anything you want, eg. yourname+football@gmail.com etc., make as many as you like)

1: Setup an email bankruptcy filter.  This is a little bit of a dick move, but if you’re getting hundreds of new emails a day, it just might work.

Step 1: Create a filter that auto-responds to all unopened emails > 14 days old w/the following message:

Your email (below) is now 14 days old and has not been opened.  To minimize email buildup your email has now been placed in the archive.  Should you still require a response simply respond back and you’ll automatically be added to the priority queue.  Thank you.

Step 2: Setup another filter that looks for the text “Your email (below)”, this will catch the email responses back to you from those still requiring your response.  Filter these into a special folder you check and respond to daily.

Good luck!

Via Kevin Rose

Here’s a few more I dug up.

Typical Mandurah line patrons

People who get on and off the train at Mandurah are a strange lot. I don’t mean to imply that all people who live in Mandurah and surrounding suburbs are less intelligent than average, but if you were to go only by activity you observe at Mandurah train station then you might be forgiven for thinking that there is something in the water inhibiting cognitive abilities. For those of my non-Perth friends, I’ll give a bit of background first.

The Perth to Mandurah train line opened around Christmas 2007. It connects Perth to Mandurah, which is WAs second largest city located about 70km south of Perth. It also provides light commuter rail services to the southwest suburbs with train stops are large centres like Cockburn, Kwinana and Rockingham. It was quite a significant and costly undertaking, and almost doubled the total length of commuter rail in Perth. It takes about 55 minutes to travel the full length.

The Mandurah line has been going now for about three years, but am still not sure people down in Mandurah have the hang of it yet:

• As the train is pulling into Mandurah, there’s naturally people there waiting to get on it. During peak times, it may take 4-5 minutes until it’s ready to turn around and leave. During non-peak times they usually run every 15-20 minutes. What I don’t get is that as the train pulls into the station, people will walk or hurriedly skip along the platform beside the train to remain in proximity to some particular door, continually pressing the button in a vain attempt to open it. Often the total length walked will be longer than two carriages, each of which has two doors. Don’t these people understand that you can simply wait in one spot and let a door come to you? Sometimes I’ll be standing on the platform and one of these over enthusiastic mouth breathers will crash into me, and then look at me as if I’m something they’ve stepped in. “Dude, why are you standing there? Can’t you see I’m trying to get on the train? Let me past!”

• In the evening on the way home from work, people will get up from their seats and wait near the door a full 3km from the station (I’ve measured it on google maps). It takes another 4-5 minutes for the train to slow down and come to a stop on the platform, but there’s always a bunch of people crowded around the door waiting to get out long before the train is anywhere near the destination. Why is this? It’s not like Mandurah is a particularly busy station, and there’s usually not that many people getting off which might contribute to a bottleneck at the exit gates or in the car park exit. Also, people seem to walk along the whole train so they’re right near the very end door, as if walking through the train will save them having to walk along the platform. It doesn’t make it any quicker to get off because so many people attempting to disembark through one door causes a bottleneck.

• The exit turnstyles are another source of puzzlement for me. Like most places we’ve got gates which open and close to let one person through at a time after reading their electronic tickets. To cater for people in wheelchairs or with prams or luggage and also for travelers without electronic tickets there’s a wider exit with no gate. It does have an electronic card reader, but is also staffed by transit guards who check that people going though the exit either possess a cash ticket of correct value or swipe their electronic tickets. The strange thing is that at least two thirds of people exiting the station prefer to use this wider, non-gated exit. I can’t understand why, for two reasons. Firstly, I’ve observed that around half the people going through this exit actually possess electronic tickets. To cater for wheelchairs, the ticket reader is closer to the ground and angled in such a way that it makes it inconvenient to use if you’re able bodied. So you usually end up with a queue of people bending over to swipe their cards and then bobbing up and down to read the feedback on how much credit they have left on their cards. Meanwhile I calmly walk through the gated exit without queuing or breaking stride. Secondly, Mandurah is the last stop on a very long train ride and cash fares are almost 9 dollars. Electronic tickets give you an automatic 25% discount so I would have thought there’d be less people with cash tickets at Mandurah. It’s always the same people with cash tickets paying 1/3rd more than they should. For the stations closer to Perth, a 25% saving of a cheaper fare isn’t much at all, but the discount sure helps with a higher fare.

On the plus side, I haven’t experienced any violence on the Mandurah line like I used to on the Midland line, so there’s that.

My sister had a baby today:

Reynolds recruiting is pleased to announce the #1 draft pick for the 2028 AFL draft is James David Reynolds. Currently weighing in a 7 pounds 10 ounces but a few  pre-seasons  in nthe gym should fix that. Mum is well and happy, dad is stoked… unless he plays for Freo…

Haw haw. Now Natalie is going to find out what having your own family is all about. I’ll see if I can attach a photo later, but we all know that babies all look the same.

So I like to have a little fun with my Facebook status messages. I’d rather post something entertaining than some thing mundane such as “I had eggs for breakfast”, or fishing for attention using something like “Three more days!”.

Here are some of my favourites from the last few months. Some names are blacked out to protect the innocent. Some are not, because they aren’t using their real names so they’re already anonymous.

I could watch this for hours. Or at least 45 minutes at a time while the International Space Station is in the sunlit part of it’s orbit. Tito, Shuttleworth, Olsen, Ansari and others each paid around $20M for this view for about 10 days. If I was a brazillionaire, I think this would be money well spent. Just the training alone would be worth the price of admission. I wouldn’t want to be called a “space tourist” though, just too demeaning. I’d prefer “intergalactic space hero” or perhaps just “cosmonaut”.